My Dog
Do you know what? I am gonna tell you about my dog, and if you don’t like it then go away. My dog was a very large dog, he really was. I mean you never saw a bigger dog than that thing was he was like almost the size of a cow, I really mean it. This dog was the biggest dog on the block. My little sister Breanna would go up to this god damn dog and play with this thing. She really would. It would kill us the silly ways she would play with him. I mean it, she really would kill us. This dog was the chocolate lab dog every family wishes they had. He really was. I mean it you know all those family’s that have like six kids and a minivan, they all wish they had a dog like he was, they really do. You must want to know why I am writing about my dog, well because its a remembering thing because my dog froze to death a few years ago. He really did, I mean it. One night we came home and couldn’t find the god damn thing and we looked everywhere. Eventually we found him under this really big tree just frozen dead, I really mean it he was really frozen. So we had to bury this dog, we really did. We buried him under this tree we found him under cause this tree was the best place, it really was. But this dog, Moose was his name, was the best. He really was. Whenever anyone of us felt all lonesome and crap inside we would go outside and play with this dog, we really would. So when he died I was so depressed it made me crazy. It really did. The one it killed most was my dad. I mean it, I never saw my dad cry the way he did when that god damn dog died. I mean it he was depressed. He really was. I gave that dog to my dad for a birthday present, I really did. Well, that was chucking the crap around, I do that. But not about moose, I never throw crap around about him, I really don’t. I really do throw crap around to people, I mean if you’re a stranger who are you to know if I’m lying to you. I mean when will I ever see them again, I guess I wont see you, unless we meet unexpectedly or we know each other, but other than that I really mean it, why do strangers care? I mean it. I really didn’t give the dog to my dad for a present my ex- step mom did, oh I was throughly disgusted with her. I mean it, she was a real nasty lady. She was full of pimples on her face and she liked to clip her toenails all over. She weighed about 245, which for a lady is really to much. I mean it she was a real disgusting lady. I mean it, I really do. So this dog was like this tiny thing until about a month later when he was he was the biggest god damn dog on the block. I really mean, this dog was huge. He really was. Really. So we buried this dog and he was the best dog, he really was. We took him hunting once and that dog took off right after we had shot the stupid pheasant and brought it right back, he really did. But we had to hide from him cause he really wanted to play with the stupid bird, he really did. And thats all I have to say about that, it really is.